


Z is for Zat'(some'thing)

by suzannemarie (finlass)



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-06-07
Updated: 2010-06-07
Packaged: 2017-10-09 23:43:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/92870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/finlass/pseuds/suzannemarie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>On a quiet evening for SG-1 offworld, the subject of changed technology comes up and Teal'c seizes an opportunity for mischief.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Z is for Zat'(some'thing)

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [Teal'c Alphabet Soup](http://sg-fignewton.livejournal.com/69669.html).
> 
> Set in the time frame of season 3-4.

SG-1 enjoyed the night and a quiet companionability as they sat around the campfire. Jack amused himself by idly firing a zat into the fire, making the flames dance. The others watched him lazily.

"Remember when three shots from a zat used to make things disappear?" Daniel commented suddenly.

"Yeah, why did that change?" Jack said.

Jack and Daniel looked at Sam, who shrugged. All three turned to Teal'c.

Teal'c's stoic exterior covered his rapid thinking. After some consideration, he adopted an air of confusion. "Zat'nik'tel's have never made things disappear," he said.

"Yes they did," Daniel answered.

"You are mistaken Daniel Jackson," Teal'c said firmly.

"No," Jack said. "I distinctly remember a time when three shots from a zat made things disappear."

"You are mistaken," Teal'c said again. He spoke with such assurance that the others began to look uncertain.

"Carter, you remember a time when zats disintegrated things, right?" Jack asked incredulously.

"Yes I do."

"Any explanations?"

"No. I've wondered about this too."

"Zats have never made things vanish," Teal'c reiterated.

"All three of us are wrong?" Jack demanded.

"Indeed."

Teal'c locked eyes briefly with Sam, who was sitting nearest to him. A flicker of sudden, silent understanding passed between them. Sam ducked her head to hide her smile. From the other side of the fire, the wordless communication was unnoticed by Jack and Daniel.

Daniel began reaching for for explanations. "Is it possible that going back in time disrupted things enough to change the course of zat development?"

"I don't see how," Sam said. "We've only gone back to 1969 and that trip didn't involve leaving Earth. We may have inadvertently changed something about Earth's history, but nothing that we did should have affected anything involving the development of alien technology."

"What about one of the crossovers from a different reality?" Daniel asked.

"I wouldn't think so," Sam said sounding interested. "For sure it didn't happen when you accidentally went through the quantum mirror, because zats were still vanishing things after you got back." She thought for a moment. "But it did change sometime after my counterpart and Kowolsky crossed over to our universe."

"Why would that make any difference?" Jack asked querulously.

"I don't know sir. Maybe it changed the energy in this universe in some way that changed how zats operate?"

"And altered Teal'c's memory at the same?" Jack demanded.

"Maybe because he's a Jaffa and we're human," Sam suggested.

"Uh huh," Jack said skeptically.

"Perhaps when others crossed into our reality it created a false memory of what zats can do, making you believe that they once did something that they have never done," Teal'c entered the debate.

"That makes even less sense than the other explanation," Jack complained.

Teal'c inclined his head philosophically.

"On the other hand, stranger things have happened," Daniel said.

"Like what?" Jack asked.

"That time the gate sent us to 1969, Urgo, that time you, Teal'c, and I switched bodies--"

"All right, strange things happen," Jack interrupted crossly. "I still don't buy that two people crossing over to our universe would affect our memories. Carter?"

"Well, it does seem unlikely," she said regretfully. "All of this talk of crossing universes has given me a different idea for why we don't share the same memories, though."

"I knew you'd have a theory before this was done," Jack said.

Sam smiled. "Maybe this isn't our Teal'c," she said.

"What?" Jack said sharply.

"Maybe there was some sort of switch," Sam suggested. She gestured toward the Jaffa. "Maybe our Teal'c is in a different universe or reality, and this Teal'c is from one where zats have never disintegrated anything."

"I don't want to hear that," Jack said.

"I don't either, really," Sam said. "But it's more reasonable to assume that one memory has been altered than everyone else's. It's even simpler if the answer is that nobody's memory has been altered, but that we're talking to a different person."

Teal'c gave Sam an approving look. She winked at him in return.

"If this is the case, the thing that concerns me is how to get the Teal'cs back to their right universes," Sam continued. "General Hammond ordered our quantum mirror destroyed and I'm not sure of any other ways to cross those barriers. Maybe the Asgard have a way."

"Why wouldn't Teal'c tell us if this were the case?" Daniel asked.

"For that matter, he could tell us how he got here," Jack added.

"Our Teal'c would. Especially if it was an accident. But what if this Teal'c is a spy?" Sam invented.

"A spy? For what purpose?" Jack was sounding increasingly frustrated.

"I assure you that I am in the proper universe. Captain Carter's theory is not correct." A palpable stillness from the other side of the campfire greeted Teal'c's words.

"Did you just call her Captain Carter?" Jack finally said.

"Indeed," Teal'c replied.

"But she's been a major for some time now," Daniel pointed out.

"I meant to say major." Somehow Teal'c contrived to sound serene and flustered at the same time.

Jack sighed heavily. "When we get back to the base, we'll have to investigate. I wish you hadn't dreamed this up, Carter."

We have to consider all possibilities," Sam said primly.

"How would we even determine if someone is our someone and not some other universe's someone?" Daniel asked. He looked sheepish at his wording.

"It would be easiest to wait," Sam shrugged. "Eventually the cascade effect will take effect if someone is where he doesn't belong."

"I hate waiting," Jack said. "Besides, if we're dealing with a potential spy we have to take action."

Teal'c relented. "I am in the correct reality. I also remember a time when the weapons made objects disintegrate. I was merely pulling your fingers," he admitted.

"Legs, Teal'c. Pulling our legs. Pulling somebody's finger is a completely different thing," Jack said.

"Does this mean that you do know why zats changed?" Daniel asked curiously.

"The weapons have not changed."

"Didn't we just have that discussion?" Jack asked.

"There are two different weapons," Teal'c explained.

"Come again?" Jack asked.

"There are two different types of zats."

"And you're telling us this _now_?" Jack asked plaintively.

"Prior to this night, no one posed the question," Teal'c said righteously.

"So there are two different kinds of zats?" Sam interjected before Jack could respond.

"There are. Zak'nik'tels are what we took from Apophis's ship. They do disintegrate objects upon the third shot. One of Apophis's underlings developed them from the more common zat'nek'tules, which do not disintegrate objects. The zat'nik'tels' creator oversaw all production of the weapons. Many years ago, after displeasing Apophis, he was executed. He never shared the secret behind his weapon. His death left behind a finite number of zat'nik'tels. These were jealously guarded by Apophis and his army. Nevertheless, the supply has steadily dwindled over the years."

"And Aphophis was the only one who had that kind of zat?" Jack asked with obvious disbelief.

"That is correct. The zats that we have recovered from other goa'uld armies have all been zat'nek'tules. Over time, the zat'nik'tels in our possession must have been lost."

"But the zats that we backward engineered were duplicated exactly from the ones that we took from Apophis's ship," Sam protested.

"Did any that you built ever have the capacity for disintegration?" Teal'c asked.

Sam thought carefully. "No, I don't believe so."

"Nor was Apophis able to find someone to precisely duplicate the zat'nik'tels. All of the many who tried were executed for their failure. By all appearances, the secret died with its inventor," Teal'c said.

"How can you tell the difference between the zats?" Jack asked.

"If it disintegrates something it's a zat'nik'tel," Teal'c said.

"Thank you Teal'c," Jack spoke with exaggerated patience. "I was referring to the look of the weapons."

"They are identical in appearance. Only their performance distinguishes them."

"I see." Jack still sounded unconvinced. "This whole conversation has been disturbing from beginning to end. I don't want to hear the word zat for a very long time."

Daniel glanced at Jack, then turned to Teal'c. "Can you tell me how the 'tel and 'tule suffixes differentiate the meaning of the kinds of zats?" he asked.

"Ah!" Jack said loudly, waving his hands, before Teal'c could answer. "I don't want to hear it!"

Daniel subsided, his expression a mixture of amusement and resignation.

Jack clearly remained skeptical. Daniel also looked suspicious. Teal'c looked innocently back at them. He could tell that neither was sure whether to believe the story, question it further, or drop the matter altogether. Their confusion fed Teal'c's sense of satisfaction.

Jack checked his watch and changed the subject. "It's nine in the morning at home. I'm going to check in with Hammond, then turn in. Tomorrow it's back to discussing naquadah access with the Sandmen."

"The Xandarchans." Daniel absently corrected Jack.

"Right. Them." Jack hauled himself to his feet.

Daniel also stood. "I'm going to stretch my legs. I'll be back in a few minutes."

Teal'c and Sam watched them walk away. Once they were out of earshot, Sam leaned toward Teal'c. "So," she said conspiratorially, "what's the real reason for the change in zats?"

"It is a great mystery, Major Carter. Bra'tac and I have spoken about this often. We have not found anyone who knows the explanation."

"It's a mystery I would love to solve," Sam said.

"It was a useful feature," Teal'c agreed. "We may never know."

"Tell you what though," Sam said cheerfully. "I got a kick out of watching you play the others."

Teal'c inclined his head. "You were an admirable ally. I anticipate our next opportunity for collaboration."

"Indeed," Sam twinkled. "Good night Teal'c."

"Good night Major Carter." Teal'c closed his eyes and prepared for kel'no'reem.


End file.
